Post 15: Geldof the Ibex

As Christmas creepily approaches I feel I should shine the torch towards what many people within the popular press are now classing as YULEPILES!

I happened upon my first YULEPILE whilst gallivanting gaily ‘pon the Alpinic peaks of the Alps.

From afar I spied a bright twinkly light and caught up by the distant yodelling of Christmas carols echoing across the foothills, the foolhardy romantic within me began to believe it to be a celestial body casting a theological net of Godly light over the snowy mountain caps.

I skipped after it, leaving my imported Sherpa sweating and gasping in my wake as he struggled to keep up with my greater levels of fitness, although, in his defence, he was carrying a lot of stuff.

After summiting a summit I gazed across a rocky valley and realised I had been mistaken, I was not following a Messianic calling to bestow gifts at the feet of a newborn leader of men, but was being guided t’ward something far more holy… It was the cheese-moon and its' sparkly reflection glimmered off of a carrot that formed the nose of the uppermost snowman of a pile of snowmen!

A veritable YULEPILE of the most magnificent proportions.

I think you’ll all agree!

I was gobsmacked with joy, ending the current cycle of Despica-piles that had depressed me so, I was now heartened and awash with happy goo as if I was bathing in a bucket filled with happy.

So taken-aback was I by the glorious pile of snowmen, that I had not initially noticed the animal that had created them, but there, standing proudly against the night sky, stood a bearded Ibex, almost as in awe of his creation as was I.  

Warning

Snowmen are by turns glorious and evil. By day they can seem peaceful and sedate, but when the full glare of the Alpine moon meets their dark-coal eyes, they will often kidnap unassuming young boys and force them to witness their psychotic killing sprees as they spread fear and death amongst the lands of Europe.

Thankfully when placed in a pile. This will not happen.